PART ONE
Once upon a time, there was a very beautiful young princess, who lived by the river, in a fashionable and up-and-coming area of a Forest. Oh, let's call the area, "Camden".
One beautiful day, the Princess went for a walk along the river, and there, she saw a very handsome minstrel. In an instant she was hypnotized by his bewitching song, for little did she know, the Minstrel was wicked and possessed evil powers.
PART TWO
For some time, the Princess thought about the Minstrel but did not see him again. Time passed (about 365 days or so) so that she thought the minstrel had been a dream, as he regularly appeared to her in her sleep, singing the song that she could not forget.
Then, one day in the market, she saw a likeness of the Minstrel on a 12 inch disk! She realized now that the Minstrel had been real, and set upon a quest to find him. She still did not suspect that the minstrel had actually cast a spell over her and it wasn't long before she found him in another fashionable area of the Forest, called, "Fulham", by the river, standing among the Gunubuflower.
When the Minstrel saw the Princess he knew he was close to capturing her heart completely, as the possession of the hearts and souls of princesses fed his survival. She dared to speak to the Minstrel, who soon played the bewitching song again and then sealed the spell with two small, sweet kisses to her cheek. A spell that would take a fucking long time and some will to wear off.
And thus, she had been charmed by he that shall be known as the Wicked Minstrel.
For a year or so, the Wicked Minstrel regularly seduced the Princess with his song, through her dreams and by appearing at her window.
However, the spell wasn't strong enough for this bloody-minded Princess, who one day belittled his song and angered him. The spell broken, she escaped and swore never to fall under his spell again.
PART THREE
However, for over 10 moons he would follow her all over the Forest. She would spot him when she least suspected it. Each time he would try to charm the Princess, with songs and charms - but she was having none of it. She was dumb but she wasn't that dumb. She'd got herself a Protection Spell.
The Wicked Minstrel had a rethink. Perhaps if the Dumb Princess thought he had vanished, he could strike again. So he left the Forest for a couple of years, until he was sure that the Protection Spell wore off.
And I tell you now, children, that is exactly what happened.
PART FOUR
After another 100 moons the Princess foolishly believed that the Protection Spell was everlasting, and she largely forgot about the Wicked Minstrel. But the Wicked Minstrel, with his mysterious powers, was sensitive to this and sought to once again entire her consciousness.
Thus, the Wicked Minstrel did cast a spell that convinced the dumb Princess that she had the strength to seek the Minstrel out again and not succumb to him. Well, on this particular occasion, she was wrong, for the Wicked Minstrel’s absence had made him stronger. Cautiously, she approached him in another part of the Forest, called, "Finchley". She didn't properly reckon on the extent of his dark powers and, again, with a kiss, he sealed an even more wicked spell. By the time she saw the White Wand, hidden in his pocket, she was already under his power. Dumb bitch.
He had a twisted power over her and strengthened the spell with an intricately weaved enchanted dance around her. At great speed, he moved this way and that, close to her and then distant, at once, fire and ice.
This confused the Princess, who wondered now what was real and what was imagined, and feared for her sanity – believing it was all in her head, like a dream - but, oooooh no, everybody else in the Forest was confused about it as well. Many had realized that he had cast a controlling spell, although they could not imagine the depths to which his evil ran.
Many handsome princes, serfs, gentlemen, suitors and other minstrels tried to rescue her and break the spell - but nothing worked. This only served to anger the Wicked Minstrel. Those who underestimated his black soul (and frankly, those who knew of it) pitied the Princess, who, not quite in control of herself, just embarrassed herself, quite frankly.
And so, he would repeatedly summon her this way to the centre of the Forest so that he could control her and begin to possess her soul.
But the Wicked Minstrel was too confident, and busied himself by exerting his powers over other people, spreading his malice even beyond the Forest, in places like, I dunno, let's say, "Germany". He didn't notice that the spell was wearing off the strong-minded Princess and she began to pity him. Then, for amusement, she would deliberately anger the Wicked Minstrel, using suitors and male companions, to punish him for placing her under his spell for so long.
As soon as the spell had completely died, she banished him beyond the mountains.
PART FIVE
Years later, the Princess wanted to forgive the Wicked Minstrel, and armed herself with another spell, called, "The Wisdom of Experience". Yes, she was still dumb enough to be seduced by the bewitching song, but as soon as he started to cast a spell again, she escaped the centre of the Forest, vowing the never return
PART SIX
A half-decade passed and the paths of the Princess and the Wicked Minstrel failed to cross again. It was heard that he had taken by force a very leafy part of the Forest - so damaged and fucked up was his ego. It ends up getting all control freaks at some stage. In time, the Dumb Princess almost forgot that the Wicked Minstrel had even existed.
Almost.
Late one night, safe in her tower, a vision appeared very suddenly in front of the Princess, bearing the image of the Wicked Minstrel! His evil brown eyes bore out at her, as if to smugly tell her that he was gaining power and control all over the kingdom and beyond!
In sheer terror, she let out a blood-curdling scream that shook the forest.
PART SEVEN
It transpired that the Wicked Minstrel had traveled far to the other side of the Great Pond, where he wandered far and with great effort to seek strength in his quest to possess the soul of the divine princess. He had gained a reputation for being a talented and benevolent man. Naturally, the Princess was intrigued. Uh-oh.
The Princess thought long and hard. She knew she was strong but she also knew that within his realm, she was powerless. She did not doubt his talent and capacity for benevolence, but she also knew his capacity for deception and wickedness. She knew that she should not try to prove to herself that he would not capture her heart again, not to mention his attempts to possess her soul.
So, she thought, fuck it then.
Once upon a time, there was a very beautiful young princess, who lived by the river, in a fashionable and up-and-coming area of a Forest. Oh, let's call the area, "Camden".
One beautiful day, the Princess went for a walk along the river, and there, she saw a very handsome minstrel. In an instant she was hypnotized by his bewitching song, for little did she know, the Minstrel was wicked and possessed evil powers.
PART TWO
For some time, the Princess thought about the Minstrel but did not see him again. Time passed (about 365 days or so) so that she thought the minstrel had been a dream, as he regularly appeared to her in her sleep, singing the song that she could not forget.
Then, one day in the market, she saw a likeness of the Minstrel on a 12 inch disk! She realized now that the Minstrel had been real, and set upon a quest to find him. She still did not suspect that the minstrel had actually cast a spell over her and it wasn't long before she found him in another fashionable area of the Forest, called, "Fulham", by the river, standing among the Gunubuflower.
When the Minstrel saw the Princess he knew he was close to capturing her heart completely, as the possession of the hearts and souls of princesses fed his survival. She dared to speak to the Minstrel, who soon played the bewitching song again and then sealed the spell with two small, sweet kisses to her cheek. A spell that would take a fucking long time and some will to wear off.
And thus, she had been charmed by he that shall be known as the Wicked Minstrel.
For a year or so, the Wicked Minstrel regularly seduced the Princess with his song, through her dreams and by appearing at her window.
However, the spell wasn't strong enough for this bloody-minded Princess, who one day belittled his song and angered him. The spell broken, she escaped and swore never to fall under his spell again.
PART THREE
However, for over 10 moons he would follow her all over the Forest. She would spot him when she least suspected it. Each time he would try to charm the Princess, with songs and charms - but she was having none of it. She was dumb but she wasn't that dumb. She'd got herself a Protection Spell.
The Wicked Minstrel had a rethink. Perhaps if the Dumb Princess thought he had vanished, he could strike again. So he left the Forest for a couple of years, until he was sure that the Protection Spell wore off.
And I tell you now, children, that is exactly what happened.
PART FOUR
After another 100 moons the Princess foolishly believed that the Protection Spell was everlasting, and she largely forgot about the Wicked Minstrel. But the Wicked Minstrel, with his mysterious powers, was sensitive to this and sought to once again entire her consciousness.
Thus, the Wicked Minstrel did cast a spell that convinced the dumb Princess that she had the strength to seek the Minstrel out again and not succumb to him. Well, on this particular occasion, she was wrong, for the Wicked Minstrel’s absence had made him stronger. Cautiously, she approached him in another part of the Forest, called, "Finchley". She didn't properly reckon on the extent of his dark powers and, again, with a kiss, he sealed an even more wicked spell. By the time she saw the White Wand, hidden in his pocket, she was already under his power. Dumb bitch.
He had a twisted power over her and strengthened the spell with an intricately weaved enchanted dance around her. At great speed, he moved this way and that, close to her and then distant, at once, fire and ice.
This confused the Princess, who wondered now what was real and what was imagined, and feared for her sanity – believing it was all in her head, like a dream - but, oooooh no, everybody else in the Forest was confused about it as well. Many had realized that he had cast a controlling spell, although they could not imagine the depths to which his evil ran.
Many handsome princes, serfs, gentlemen, suitors and other minstrels tried to rescue her and break the spell - but nothing worked. This only served to anger the Wicked Minstrel. Those who underestimated his black soul (and frankly, those who knew of it) pitied the Princess, who, not quite in control of herself, just embarrassed herself, quite frankly.
And so, he would repeatedly summon her this way to the centre of the Forest so that he could control her and begin to possess her soul.
But the Wicked Minstrel was too confident, and busied himself by exerting his powers over other people, spreading his malice even beyond the Forest, in places like, I dunno, let's say, "Germany". He didn't notice that the spell was wearing off the strong-minded Princess and she began to pity him. Then, for amusement, she would deliberately anger the Wicked Minstrel, using suitors and male companions, to punish him for placing her under his spell for so long.
As soon as the spell had completely died, she banished him beyond the mountains.
PART FIVE
Years later, the Princess wanted to forgive the Wicked Minstrel, and armed herself with another spell, called, "The Wisdom of Experience". Yes, she was still dumb enough to be seduced by the bewitching song, but as soon as he started to cast a spell again, she escaped the centre of the Forest, vowing the never return
PART SIX
A half-decade passed and the paths of the Princess and the Wicked Minstrel failed to cross again. It was heard that he had taken by force a very leafy part of the Forest - so damaged and fucked up was his ego. It ends up getting all control freaks at some stage. In time, the Dumb Princess almost forgot that the Wicked Minstrel had even existed.
Almost.
Late one night, safe in her tower, a vision appeared very suddenly in front of the Princess, bearing the image of the Wicked Minstrel! His evil brown eyes bore out at her, as if to smugly tell her that he was gaining power and control all over the kingdom and beyond!
In sheer terror, she let out a blood-curdling scream that shook the forest.
PART SEVEN
It transpired that the Wicked Minstrel had traveled far to the other side of the Great Pond, where he wandered far and with great effort to seek strength in his quest to possess the soul of the divine princess. He had gained a reputation for being a talented and benevolent man. Naturally, the Princess was intrigued. Uh-oh.
The Princess thought long and hard. She knew she was strong but she also knew that within his realm, she was powerless. She did not doubt his talent and capacity for benevolence, but she also knew his capacity for deception and wickedness. She knew that she should not try to prove to herself that he would not capture her heart again, not to mention his attempts to possess her soul.
So, she thought, fuck it then.
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